comin down with a case of homesickness.

So who knew it would happen to me of all people. I usually never get too sentimental about anything especially while I'm trying to be all big and tough and brave by myself but this week has been hard. My very first week of work and it has been cold and rainy.  I hear that it is beautiful in Utah and everywhere I look (facebook and instagram) it seems like everyone is just havin a party now that schools out and their summer vacation has begun and I am 2000 miles away living with strangers working 10 hour days. It just didn't seem right. I also found I really hate the rain. It totally gets to my emotions and it makes me miss the sun. And anyone that knows me understands that I love warm weather and sunshine more than anything else so it was hard sitting inside all week. I took a couple of jogs around the neighborhood to get to know the area a little better but it was just so weird. Everything was so different from home. The houses, the feel of the town, the people, the smells.  It was hard. I really missed home and time seemed to drag on and on. Every night when I was going to bed I would count how many more days i had and that just made things seem worse cause 2 days down on a 100+ count down does not really make quite the dent I was hoping for. I missed my friends and family so much. I did not know anyone other than my nanny family. Even church was depressing. There was like 40 people in the ward and NO ONE my age. It was sucky ducky. All I wanted was to be in Holladay Utah where everyone I know is basically like family and everything is familiar. I missed everything, including my mountains to tell me where I am. Out here on the east coast there is no hope of knowing your directions so finding things with out a GPS is like suicide. It made me realize the little things that I usually take for granted like the sounds and smells from home that I love so much. Like when I step out my front door and my alarm goes "beep, beep, beep" or when I walk in my house and my mom is making some sort of delicious something and it smells up the house, or sitting at my kitchen table with my family laughing so hard and loud it could be heard miles away.  I missed staying out late playin with my friends and doing crazy stuff with them. I miss the convenience of everything.  When I am home having a nice time is just at my fingertips but out here I have to explore around and figure out what things make me happy out here.  So that is my newest adventure. Finding out what is home to me in Connecticut.

xoxo